What:
Mess + Noise Lunch Box series
Where:
1000 £ Bend, 361 Little Lonsdale St, Melbourne
When:
Fri Feb 5, 1pm
How much:
Free!
Description:
Here's the perfect excuse to dodge the perennial lunch date proposition from mail room Dave! Leave him drooping at the watercooler while you sprint off to see Denim Owl perform for free at 1000 £ Bend's purpose-built exhibition space, at the respectable lunching time of 1pm. Friday's gig marks the first of many in the monthly Mess + Noise lunchbox series. If Dave guilted you into getting hand rolls instead, don't worry – all performances will be recorded for M+N TV. – REJ
What:
Weekly zine review #2 - Comic of Smallness
Where:
Sticky Institute, Campbell Arcade, Degraves Street Subway, Melbourne. Or online via Sticky's new mail order department.
How much:
$2
Contact the zinester:
Hutcho
For those who know that Less is More, feel that the 50c coin is way oversized and get frustrated with the clunkiness of mobile phones these days, Green Comix presents to you the Comic of Smallness. Nanotechnology is finally here and it's 32 miniature pages where the only thing oversized is the staple holding it together and the dandy dog character's earplugs. Follow Barry cat's adventures, see his snores vibrate buildings, and read actual dolphin dialogue.
Then tuck your Comic of Smallness in the lining of your wallet with the smug knowledge that all the wisdom of the world has been converted from oversized broadsheets to tabloid to the folded booklet, the fashionable quarter size zine and now - to this. The Comic of Smallness. Human civilisation has reached its peak. This is exactly the comic the Chinese astronauts will be reading when they reach Mars. Forget the guy who can write your name on a grain of rice. What's the use of that? Comics of Smallness is where it's at.
What:
Bobby Boomerang (Cut Copy / Cutters Records) at Mind Fractals
Where:
The Toff, Lvl 2, 252 Swanston St, Melbourne
When:
Thurs Feb 4, doors 11pm
How much:
Free!
Description:
Bobby Boomerang (Cut Copy / Cutters Records) is this week's guest at Mind Fractals. Do you know what Mind Fractals is? The organisers assure you that "Shit like this happens every Thursday at the Toff! Believe it!" They are freeing people's minds every week with disco, house, techno, cosmic enjoyment, and free entry. - Us.
What:
Renee Cosgrave and Merryn Lloyd opening
Where:
The Narrows, Lvl 2, 141 Flinders La, Melbourne
When:
Thurs Feb 4, 6-8pm
How much:
Free!
Description:
The first Narrows show for 2010 (not counting the psychedelic book sale) is Renee Cosgrave's drawings about drawing and Merryn Lloyd's questioning collages. Start the year as you mean to go on and get to this Narrows opening early. - Us.
What:
Pisco Sour Day
Where:
24 Moons, AC/DC Lane
When:
Sat Feb 6, from 5pm
How much:
Free entry!
Description:
You might not have heard of 24 Moons,'The Modern Day Speakeasy', but it's a new bar in the city and Kane Daniel is managing it. If you know what that means we don't need to tell you to go to Pisco Sour Day. If you don't know, well Pisco is the national sprit of Peru, Saturday February 6 is a national Peruvian drinking holiday, and Kane Daniel is the funniest cocktail genius on Twitter. DJ-ing at this sacred piss up will be Steve Asquith (of Block Projects gallery) and his alter ego for all we know, Brewster. B. - Us.
What:
Jay Reatard Tribute Show, with Kamikaze Trio, UV Race and Useless Children
Where:
Ding Dong, 18 Market La, Melbourne
When:
Sat Jan 30, doors 8pm
How much:
$10 on the door
Description:
GIG OF THE WEEK!! As you know, Jay Reatard died last week at the age of 29, one of the most prolific punk musicians and song writers of our time, who recorded his own height in records and played in around 20 bands since he was 14. Melbourne loved Jay Reatard, and what did he love? He loved to start punchups with people and then Tweet about it. He really did rule. Playing at the tribute night will be Kamikaze Trio, UV Race and Useless Children plus DJs Candy Cut, Pissing On The Mainframe and Stained Circles who are bringing all the songs from his back catalogue as well as songs he liked. Proceeds from the door to go to a charity nominated by Jay Reatard's father. - Us.
What:
The Tattoo of Your Name on My Butt
Where:
eBay (then Kirsty's butt)
When:
On now! Auction ends Sun Feb 8.
How much:
Reserve price $2000
I need to make everyone aware that, in what may be the greatest artwork ever conceived by the human mind, Kirsty Hulm is now auctioning her butt on eBay. She says, "If you win I will tattoo your name on my ass in hand written font, 1cm high. You will receive a photo for your personal records."
Now, I've always liked Kirsty Hulm's stuff. Her business card - which has no contact details just Kirsty Hulm. Artist. Here For You stamped on one side. That neon sign - "Imagine Me And You, I Do" attached to the steeple of St Paul's Cathedral. But the KH is now taking it to a new level. What if Daniel Beeson buys her butt? Or the McLelland Gallery and Sculpture Park? Will she have to drive to Mornington every time they have an acquisitions show?
Some of you are hoping I will now quote a German philosopher to justify your intense desire to have your name on Kirsty Hulm's ass, but, as Hélène Cixous said, tough titties. (Note from Kirsty: "I have no other tattoos on my butt, so it will be very prominent.")
What:
Sonic Fabric
Where:
Browse and order online
How much:
$20-$120+
Do you ever wonder what happened to your trusty old cassette tapes after you binned them at first sight of a delicious silvery Compact Disc? Sonic Fabric know, because they've got them. Driven by an ethos of upcycling and repurposing - as well as maintaining cutting edge style and a good dose of experimentalism - this NY-based fashion brand take the long strands of magnetic tape out of our old cassettes and, through a process I can only deem as magic, weave them into scarves, neckties, and other modern accessories and fabric.
Sure, that's impressive enough in itself, and does make the child inside us think about raiding the op-shop sale bin for some old Kenny Rogers cassettes to make into clothing of our own. But Sonic Fabric gets even better. Because the tape retains its magnetic quality through the transformation process, your tie or dress will actually play music when it comes into contact with the tape heads of an old cassette player. Unfortunately it's not whole songs, but more of a DJ-like mash up of all the music contained within your garment.
What:
Heatless Ark
Who:
Blank Realm
On:
Not Not Fun
Intuition plays a large part in the nature of music. Whether learned on their chosen instrument or approaching it from a new angle, the ability of a group of players to lock into and interweave with each other's sounds is a crucial dynamic. This instinctual nature shines through strongly on Blank Realm's debut vinyl release, Heatless Ark.
That three of the members are siblings may account for the ease with which this Brisbane band shift from soundscape to soundscape. From the druggy jaunt of the title track to the suicide in slow mo of ‘Blues Helix', you can hear as sounds are tested, bent and prodded until everything suddenly snaps into focus. Tangents appear, tangents are followed, tangents are resolved, and songs are born.
Blank Realm possess that rare talent of appearing to be loose and free whilst actually remaining tight and connected. For this level of awareness to be apparent so early in their career only bodes well for the future.
What:
Skin and Threads Melbourne store
Where:
1104 High St, Armadale
When:
Opens Fri Jan 29, then Mon-Sat 9.30am-5.30pm, Sun 11am-5pm
Contact:
9576 1000
Fashion can be painful. Heels that hurt your feet, handbags that hurt your back. Oh, and skinny jeans can apparently cause nerve damage and impotence. Meanwhile, miniskirts and boob-tubes can result in revealing moments that harm one's pride - and isn't emotional damage the biggest ouch of all?
Penelope Forsyth and Emma Gathercole (the ladies behind Skin and Threads) understand these dilemmas. Thus they created a range of designer basics (read: American Apparel for grown ups) which keep you looking super-stylin' while feeling like you're still in XXL pyjamas - yes by the Hammer of Thor!
After buying an entirely new wardrobe at their first Melbourne store you'll also have a warranted and euphortastic feeling that you've taken your life (and emotional health) on a shopping trip for the better. "I'm going to become wonderful. It's a new beginning, like a Phoenix rising..."
PS: I think Liz Lemon would really like Skin and Threads.
